A Party in the Gryffindor Common Room
by SilverWolf7007
Summary: A sneaky Harry has invited nearly everyone but the Hufflpuffs to a party, including his parents and Cedric who have been resurrected by a vampire named Sylvan as well as Voldemort and some of his Death Eaters. Wormtail is tortured and the teachers crash.
1. Chapter One

Forgive me, I was bored, and thus I began to write. And write. And this little story came into being. Enjoy.

* * *

**A Party in the Gryffindor Common Room**

_By SilverWolf7007_

**_Some Place Where the Dead Work and Play - Well, Play More Than Work_**

Cedric ducked as a curse shot over his head, aiming for a young woman with red hair.

The dark haired man who sent it also had to duck as his wife retaliated, missing him and hitting her favourite vase.

The bright purple vase of lilies crashed to the ground, making a mess and beginning an argument.

"It's all your fault!"

"My fault? No, it's yours!"

"Yours!"

"Yours!"

"Yours!"

"Yours!"

"Yours!"

"Yours!"

"Yours!"

"Yours!"

"Yours!"

"Yours!"

"Yours!"

"Yours!"

Cedric rolled his eyes and turned the page in his book ('101 Ways to Haunt the Living'). This was getting repetitive.

"It was not my fault, James Potter!"

"Yes it was, dear."

"Was not!"

"Was too!"

"Was no - "

"Of, for Merlin's sake cut it out!" Cedric exclaimed in exasperation. "I'm the bloody teenager here, and I'm the mature one!"

James and Lily both turned to him, looking sheepish.

"Sorry Cedric," Lily said. "It's just, we've been here for years! There's only so much one can do around this place."

"You are right though, James, it _was _Lily's fault."

"Cedric Diggory!"

"Eeep!"

"Run, Ced!"

"Cedric! James! When I get my hands on you I'll - "

Cedric and James leaped over the back of the couch that Cedric had been sitting on, ducking behind it just in time to avoid Lily's Leglocker curse.

"Hold it!" a voice yelled.

They all stopped and turned to the newcomer. He'd been hit by James's Jellylegs jinx, and was wobbling his way to the nearest chair.

James blushed and used the counter-curse. "Sorry. I was trying to hit my wife. Who're you?"

The man looked at the three of them in amusement. He was tall, with short blond hair tipped with dark blue. His eyes were a dark blue that matched his tips, and none of them had the slightest clue as to who he was.

"I'm Sylvan. I know, that's no explanation. But see, I'm a vampire, and I'm here to stir up trouble. So, I'm going to bring the three of you back to life!"

They stared at him in shock. "What?" they said blankly.

Sylvan sighed impatiently. "Look, don't ask questions, just enjoy your life, and make trouble." He grinned. "See ya!"

The room spun around them at an increasingly fast rate, and the three of them felt as though they were going to be ill. Fortunately, they stopped spinning before any of them could.

They had arrived back on earth, fully alive, in the middle of a forest.

"Oh no," James muttered.

"What?" Cedric and Lily demanded.

"This is the Forbidden Forest. We're not too far away from Hogwarts." He smirked suddenly. "I think I'll take Sylvan's parting advice to heart. Who else is up for shocking the socks off Hogwarts?"

* * *

**_Voldemort's Evil Lair_**

Lucius smirked as Voldemort began to laugh evilly. Watching Crabbe and Goyle (senior), Avery, and Marcus Flint dressed in (respectively) pink, yellow, orange and purple tutus and dancing ballet was always good for a laugh.

He picked up his cup of tea and took a sip. Suddenly he felt something small and furry touch his lip.

Slowly lowering the cup, he looked around thoughtfully. No, it wasn't Wormtail. The smelly rat was wearing a cheerleading outfit and standing at Voldemort's side, sniggering over the ballet.

Lucius took a steadying breath and looked down into his cup. A small grey mouse looked back.

He screamed and flung the cup away, and it landed on Flint's head.

Voldemort calmly removed the cup from his minion's head, including the mouse.

He slowly turned and faced the crowd of Death Eaters. "Who threw this and ruined the performance?"

"I apologize, My Lord. There was a mouse in it…" Lucius trailed off, knowing the Dark Lord wouldn't stand for a mouse in his Lair. They scared Lucius.

"Wormtail, you disappoint me," Voldemort told the most irritating of his followers. "I thought you, of all people, would be able to get rid of the annoying mouse from the kitchens."

Wormtail squeaked.

"Instead," Voldemort continued, "The damn thing ended up in Lucius's cup of tea."

Wormtail began to shudder. Voldemort _hated _to see anything bad happen to Lucius, as the blond man was his favourite Death Eater. Not necessarily his most loyal (as that title was permanently taken by Bellatrix), but nonetheless his favourite.

"So, My Lord, what are you going to do the snivelling little rat?" asked Avery.

"Well Avery," the Dark Lord answered, "I'm going to let Lucius decide on that. After all, it was his tea that was ruined."

Lucius grinned Evilly and used a spell to transform Wormtail into his rat form. "My Lord, I'm sure you wont mind if I the rat to Malfoy Manor to deal with him? It's just that all his screaming, or squealing, will ruin the performance."

"If that is what you wish to do, Lucius, then please, go ahead. Just make it torture worthy of the Dark Lord's favourite Death Eater."

Lucius picked Wormtail up and turned to go.

"One more thing, Lucius. Could you please nominate someone for me to practice my Tickling Charm on later?"

"Perhaps Parkinson, My Lord. I seem to remember that he turned my pillow into a mouse in our fourth year." He turned to Parkinson. "Sorry Dan, but I never got you back for that."

Lucius turned and left, heading to the designated Apparition point. He could hear the laughter of the Death Eaters as he went, no doubt watching the ballet performance.

* * *

**_Unidentified Hallway in the Hogwarts Dungeons_**

"Draco!"

The blond Slytherin turned around and found himself face to face with Harry. "Hi. What do you want?"

His Gryffindor rival smirked. "We're having a party up in the Common Room. Ravenclaws are invited, no Hufflepuffs allowed. Want to come?"

Draco considered it. "Just me? I dunno, the Gryffindors would eat me alive. Lions do that to snakes."

"You'll have the Ravenclaws to talk to."

"How come no Hufflepuffs are invited?" Draco asked curiously.

Harry gave him an incredulous look. "Are you kidding? There's alcohol, they'd rat us out to the teachers. Plus, have you ever attended one of their parties?"

"No, have you?"

He nodded. "They played pin the tail on the Hippogriff. And this was the seventh year's graduation party we're talking about. Ginny, Seamus, Neville and I left after ten minutes so we didn't fall asleep!"

"Back to the original subject. One Slytherin? Me?"

Harry grinned. "All right Draco, you can invite your housemates. Fifth year and up only, though. We've already kicked the younger Gryffindors and Ravenclaws out, sent them to the Ravenclaw Common Room."

"Anyone else coming?"

"Yep. We've invited a whole heap of people. Are you in?"

"Sure thing. I'll get the Slytherins then. See you in twenty?"

"Okay."

* * *

_**Hogwarts Castle**_

It suddenly occurred to Lucius that he didn't know where to find the man he was looking for. He'd have to ask the one person who would that he _could _find - Harry Potter.

He Apperated to Hogsmeade, and walked up to the castle. Luckily, he knew where to find the Gryffindor Common Room.

Just outside the entrance, he nearly ran into the sixth year he was there to see.

"Hello Harry."

"Lucius Malfoy. Are you looking for Draco? He's not here yet, but I'm sure if you wait a bit - "

"No, no. Actually Harry, I was here to see you."

"What for?"

"I need to see your godfather about an old friend. Any idea where I can find him?"

"'Old friend'? Are we talking small, twitchy, and flea ridden?"

Lucius winced and pulled said rat out of his pocket. "Fleas? Ugh, now I'll have to get my robes sterilized."

"Sirius is in the Common Room."

"What on earth is he doing in there?" Lucius asked in surprise.

"We're having a party," Harry answered. "Want to join us?"

Lucius gave him a suspicious look. "Any Hufflepuffs?"

"No way. Do I look that stupid?"

"No, you don't. Slytherins?"

"Of course. And Ravenclaws."

"All right then."

Lucius followed Harry into the Common Room, deciding to have some fun that didn't include Crabbe and Goyle in anything less than robes.

* * *

**_Gryffindor Tower  
_**

Cedric had deserted Lily and James, deciding upon a different course of action. He knocked on the entrance to Gryffindor Tower.

Harry opened the door. "Hey Dr - Hold on, you aren't the Slytherins. Hi Cedric. I'd invite you to the party, but no Hufflepuffs allowed."

The blond ex-dead boy blinked. "Um, Harry? You are aware that I'm supposed to be dead, right?"

The Gryffindor nodded. "Yep. Hey, that makes you an ex-Hufflepuff. All right, then, want to join the party?"

"Okay. Maybe someone else will be shocked at my appearance."

"I'm sure of it." Harry frowned suddenly, and passed Cedric a camera. "You go in and take pictures of people fainting and the expressions on everyone else's faces when they see you alive not dead. I've got something to do, but I'll be back before the Slytherins arrive!"

He let Cedric pass him, ignored Colin Creevey's scream, and headed for the staffroom.

* * *

**Unidentified Hallway Not Too Far From the Great Hall**

Lily was looking for James. He'd run off, muttering something about Defence Against the Dark Arts class and Flitwick.

Before she found him, however, she ran into Snape. Literally.

"Ow! Watch where you're go - Oh…Er…" He fainted.

Lily giggled. "He never was one for surprises."

She levitated his body, deciding to leave it somewhere more convenient. Like glued to the ceiling with nothing but Gryffindor boxer shorts on.

* * *

_**Dumbledore's Office**_

"So Headmaster, I heard that the position of DADA professor is open again. Might I ask why?"

"Well Mr Parker, the last man to hold the position found that he was unable to handle the stress of sixth year Gryffindor and Slytherin classes. They have the subject together, and their rivalry is famous."

"I see. Which students are causing the problem?"

"Until they recently formed a friendship, it was Harry Potter and Draco Malfoy. Now it's Ron Weasley and Samuel Avery, as well as Hermione Granger and Millicent Bulstrode. But it's nowhere near as bad, nearly undetectable now. They save it for Potions."

"Hm."

"Do you think you're up to the job?"

"Of course."

"Why don't you head down to the staffroom. Filius Flitwick, our Charms Professor, should be down there now."

"I'll do that. Have a good night, Albus Dumbledore."

"You too, James Potter."

"How'd you know it was me?"

"I'm very good at guessing. Plus, I recognised your voice, and you haven't taken your hood down once."

"Oh. Bye then."

"Good luck when you start teaching."

"Why? I thought you said they weren't as bad?"

"Oh yes, but Harry and Draco have a prank record as nearly as long as yours, and that's only in the past month. You had a year of solo operating."

"Oh. Um. Eeep."

Albus chuckled. "Like I said, good luck. You'll need it."

"I reckon I will."

"One more thing. Don't bother hiding who you are, as long as you tell Harry first so he doesn't die of shock."

"Deal."

* * *

**_Hogwarts Staffroom_**

"Checkmate."

Flitwick looked at the new DADA professor incredulously. He had never lost a game of chess in his life, not to the Headmaster, not to McGonagall, and not even to Ron Weasley.

But now he had, and he didn't even know the man's name.

"Ah, but I do love chess," the man said, leaning casually back in his chair.

"Please, tell me your name," Flitwick asked. "I'm not losing to someone I don't know."

He nodded. "Very well, Professor Flitwick. My name is James Potter." He removed his hood, proving this fact.

Flitwick fainted.

James sighed. He hated it when people did that! Just because he was dead…

"Oh Jamie!" an irritating voice called. He sighed.

"Yes dear?" he called back.

His wife bounded into the room. "Wher - Oh James! You made Flitwick faint again! Please don't tell me you turned his hair purple!"

"Okay, I wont tell you. And I didn't, anyway. I just took my hood off!"

"Anyone would think you two hated one another," someone commented from the doorway.

They looked up and found themselves looking at a young man of about sixteen, with black hair and green eyes.

"Er, what makes you think we don't?" James asked. Lily was speechless after seeing the resemblance between her husband and this young stranger.

"Because you're married," the teen said in an amused tone.

James opened his mouth, but Lily beat him to it. "Harry?"

The green eyed youth smirked. "The one and only."

Lily stared at her son in shock. "Um, aren't you supposed to be shocked to see us, and cry, and yell out Mum and Dad and get all emotional and stuff?"

He shrugged. "I dunno. I've never had parents suddenly come back to life before."

"Oh. Well, of course you haven't! James and I haven't ever come back to life!"

"Ah, speaking of which; Harry, have you seen Cedric Diggory around here?" James asked.

Harry nodded. "Yeah, he's in the Gryffindor Common Room." He smirked suddenly. "Say, d'you want to come back with me? I'd like to see Ron and Hermione faint when they see you. And Draco. And everyone. We've got a whole heap of people up there; Ravenclaw, Slytherin, Gryffindor, Sirius, Remus, Lucius Malfoy. And Seamus got some alcohol. Up for a party?"

James grinned. "Alcohol? Party? No Hufflepuffs? I'm there!"

"James!" Lily scolded.

"Well, come on then. We don't have all night."

Lily and James followed their son to the Gryffindor Common Room, both knowing that this would be a party like no other.

* * *

Now, that wasn't too bad, was it? Tell me your thoughts!

Please review!

SW


	2. Chapter Two

_**A Party In The Gryffindor Common Room**_

_By SilverWolf7007_

**_Gryffindor Common Room_**

Harry arrived just outside the Common Room, along with Lily and James, at the exact same time as Draco and the Slytherins.

Draco blinked rapidly after seeing Lily and James, and turned to Harry. "Am I hallucinating, or are your parents standing right behind you?"

"They're really there, Draco." Harry smirked. "I'm rather disappointed that you didn't faint."

The blond glared at him. "Oh come off it Harry, I'm not some weak-willed Gryffindor. If anyone's going to faint from the sight of them, it's going to be someone already in your Common Room."

Harry shrugged. "You're probably right. Either way, we ought to get on with this."

Blaise Zabini, standing at Draco's side, nodded. "Yeah. I think that if I have to stand around here any longer I may actually fall asleep. And there's nowhere comfortable to do so out here."

Before Harry could tell the fat lady the password, though, the portrait flew open and Cedric flew out, landing on his butt.

"Ow."

Harry raised an eyebrow. "What _are _you doing down there, Diggory?"

Cedric glared up at him. "Get a less violent best friend, already. Ron Weasley is _mean_."

Harry blinked. "Ron? Mean? Ron's as harmless as a first-year Hufflepuff in a fluffy pink bunny suit. What could he have done to you?"

The ex-Hufflepuff pouted. "He thought I was You-Know-Who disguised as me to get to you!"

"Did that make sense to anyone?" Blaise wondered.

Cedric rolled his eyes. "To accommodate for your tiny Slytherin brain capacity – "

_"Hey_!" yelled the offended majority of the Slytherins. Crabbe and Goyle merely blinked in confusion (as big words like 'accommodate', 'capacity' and 'brain' tended to bewilder them).

"Ahem. Sorry. But anyway, Harry, d'you think you could convince Ron that I'm not evil?"

Harry shrugged. "I'll try, Cedric, but I can't guarantee anything. Ron can be as stupid as Crabbe and Goyle when the mood strikes him."

The blond grinned suddenly. "On the other hand, I think seeing Colin Creevey fainting was worth getting kicked out on my arse."

"Thank god _someone _fainted," Harry muttered.

Blaise nodded. "Fainting is always fun to see."

Cedric gave them a dirty look for interrupting before he continued to speak. "And some of the pictures I got are absolutely priceless!"

James raised an eyebrow. "You took pictures? Where'd you get a camera?"

"I lent him mine," Harry answered. "C'mon, let's get this party started!"

And so, Harry, Cedric, James, Lily, Draco and Blaise led the Slytherins into the Gryffindor Common Room.

"Argh!" Ron yelled, looking terrified. "Harry! You-Know-Who is here, pretending to be Cedric Diggory!"

Most of the Gryffindors and Ravenclaws watched, wondering how this was going to play out.

The guests from out of the school moved closer, but didn't speak.

Those who had just entered looked unimpressed, except for Cedric (who was glaring at Ron and trying not to sulk about the fact that no one _ever _believed him about _anything_), James, Draco and Blaise (who were laughing hysterically) and Lily, who was frowning at Ron in disapproval.

Harry raised an eyebrow. "Er, Ron?"

The red head seemed to have calmed down a little. "Yes Harry?"

"You do know that when Voldemort is near I get a massive headache?"

"Well, yes."

"I don't have one now. I can assure you that this is really Cedric Diggory."

"Oh." Ron looked highly embarrassed, but it was then that he laid eyes on James and Lily. "Um, Harry? Is that who I think..."

Harry nodded, smirking ever so slightly. "Yep. Everyone, meet my parents; James and Lily Potter."

Ron fainted.

So did Colin, Hermione, Ginny, Lavender, Parvati, Padma, Lisa and Luna.

Dean, Terry, and Neville pinched themselves. "Ow!" they all cried, obviously discovering that no, they weren't dreaming. Terry and Dean then proceeded to faint, while Neville smiled and waved at Lily (as James was still laughing at Cedric and had collapsed on the ground, where he was being sent odd looks from Draco and Blaise, who had calmed down).

Lucius groaned. "Oh crap. The Potters. This is _just _what I need!" Suddenly he brightened up considerably. "On the other hand, four torturers are better than three! This _is _just what I need!"

Sirius gaped at them. "James? Lily?" He frowned. "James! You prat! You owe me twenty galleons!"

Lily narrowed her eyes at them both. "Have you two been placing bets again?"

"It was twenty years ago, Lils, I don't think it counts," Sirius informed her.

Remus nodded in their direction from his seat by the fire. "Hey guys."

"Hey, Moony," James said back.

_"Remy_!" Lily shrieked, leaping onto his lap and hugging him.

Remus's eyes widened and he slowly began turning blue from lack of air. "Lils...need...air...must...breathe..."

Lily pulled back and stood up, looking sheepish. "Sorry Remy. Didn't mean to suffocate you."

He grinned back, having caught his breath. "No worries Lils. It's not like you've never done it before."

James sighed. "Will someone please tell me _why _no one seems to be surprised to see us?"

Harry shrugged. "You mean aside from those who pinched themselves and/or fainted? No idea." He looked over at Lucius. "Have you told Sirius and Remus yet?"

Lucius shook his head. "No, I haven't had the chance."

"Tell us what?" Remus asked.

"I have someone here that you might want to speak with. You too, James. And maybe even Lily."

Sirius looked hopeful. "Does he have fleas?"

Lucius groaned. "I was trying to forget about that, but yes. Harry, can we borrow your dorm?"

Harry nodded, grinning. "Sure. Have fun, and don't get anything dirty."

Sirius and Remus followed Lucius up the stairs.

James turned to Harry. "You sure you don't mind if we're torturing during your party?"

"Of course I don't! If I weren't a host here, and the only Gryffindor who can stand the Slytherins, I'd be joining you."

"Thanks kid. I always knew you'd turn out all right." He ran up the stairs.

"Use a silencing charm!" Harry yelled after him. A muffled yell of "Okay" confirmed that James had heard him. He turned to Lily. "Not going to join them, Mum?"

She shook her head. "No, I'll let the boys have their fun."

Harry grinned at her. "I'm glad _someone _decided to stick around." He glanced down at the four boys and seven girls lying unconscious on the floor. "Could someone wake them up, please?"

Most people merely exchanged reluctant looks, knowing perfectly well that Hermione would probably begin firing questions at a high volume the second that she regained consciousness.

Lily, not knowing this, sighed impatiently. "I'll do it."

Instead of using an awakening spell, Lily conjured several buckets full of ice-cold water, which she proceeded to dump over the eleven students. The buckets vanished.

The girls all gasped and sputtered, while Dean and Terry used drying charms on themselves.

Remaining out cold on the floor were Colin and Ron.

Lily glared.

Harry sighed, and walked over to where they were lying. "Ron," he said quietly. "Hermione's naked."

Ron sat up quickly. "What? Where!" Seeing Hermione glaring at Harry while fully clothed, he turned and glowered at his smirking best friend. Harry ignored him and moved over to Colin.

"Hey Colin," he said. "Snape's in here looking for your camera."

Colin didn't move.

"Ginny's wearing nothing but a g-string?" he tried. Ginny gave him a dirty look, but Colin didn't react.

"Draco's wearing nothing but a g-string."

"Hey!" the blond protested. Ron started to gag at the thought, and Cedric slowly raised an eyebrow.

Harry shrugged. "It was worth a try." He turned back to Colin. "You're missing Potions."

Colin still didn't wake, and Harry threw up his hands in defeat. "I give up! I wanna party!"

The Gryffindors, Ravenclaws and Slytherins cheered, grabbing drinks. Someone turned on some music, and people began to dance and chat.

"Then party we shall!" Seamus exclaimed brightly. "Who wants a Butterbeer?"

Colin sat up abruptly. "Butterbeer? Where?"

Harry groaned and grabbed a bottle of firewhisky from the table Seamus had sat the drinks on. "I am now going to get very, very, very drunk. Don't bug me."

Lily snatched his bottle before he'd have a chance to start. "Oh no you don't young man. I am not going to have my son getting drunk!"

Harry looked at her steadily. "Mum," he said evenly. "I have had a very stressful year. The last five minutes were just the last straw. Now give me the goddamn alcohol before I hex you to Australia and leave you there to be eaten by kangaroos!"

"Kangaroos don't eat people, or meat for that matter," Hermione informed him.

He glared at her. "Hermione, _I KNOW THAT_!"

Her eyes widened. "Oh god. It's finally happened. Harry's snapped!"

Blaise rolled his eyes. "No he hasn't. He just wants to drink himself into oblivion and wake up with a hangover worse than any he's ever had before."

Lily turned to face the Slytherin. "He's been hung over before?" she demanded.

Harry glared at his friend, who gulped.

Colin stood up and grabbed a Butterbeer. Harry turned his glare on him instead of Blaise. Colin, not used to being subjected to a full-fledged Harry Potter Death Glare, did the only thing that made sense to him at the time. He fainted.

"I just realised something!"

Lily, Harry, Seamus, Hermione, Draco, Blaise, Ron, and Ginny turned to Cedric.

"What?" Harry asked, narrowing his eyes.

Cedric didn't seem to notice that he'd earned a mild Death Glare. "I've let Lucius, James, Remus and Sirius torture Peter Pettigrew without me! The arsehole rat killed me, and I'm not even helping!"

Harry suddenly lost his Glare and grinned at the ex-Hufflepuff instead. "You're right, Cedric. When you get up there, give the rat an extra kick for me, will you?"

The blond nodded. "Sure thing, Harry," he said cheerfully before bounding away and running up the staircase.

They heard a door open, and then close. There was no doubt that Wormtail was getting what he deserved.

Lily grabbed eight glasses and began pouring whiskey. "We might as well join the party, I suppose," she sighed.

Harry smirked, but didn't let his mother see. He'd known she'd come around eventually.

* * *

**_The Great Hall_  
**

Albus Dumbledore and Minerva McGonagall were, as usual, the first to show up in the Great Hall for dinner.

At least, they thought they were. But once sitting at the staff table, they glanced up at the ceiling, only to see someone else had beaten them.

Severus Snape, however, was unaware that he had done so, as he was glued to the ceiling.

Minerva blinked in shock. "Is it just me, Albus or is Severus up there wearing nothing but Gryffindor boxer shorts?"

Albus seemed unfazed by the odd location and attire of his Potions Master. "It's not just you. I wonder who put him up there?"

She snorted. "_Do_ you?" she said irritably. "I personally think it's your new DADA professor, one of his partners in crime, or perhaps his wife."

"Why Minerva, I do believe that you may be correct. Care to bet on which?"

"Ten Galleons on Lily."

He raised an eyebrow. "I rather favour Sirius myself."

"I'm putting my money on James," Filius Flitwick commented as he hoisted himself onto his chair.

Amanda Hooch, who had come in with him, shook her head. "I'm with Minnie. It was Lily."

"I'm leaning towards Remus," Poppy Pomfrey put in.

"If I tell you who wins the money, will someone get me down?"

The five of them looked up at Severus in unison. He glared.

Amanda sighed, stood up and levitated the Potions Master down.

Once on his feet, Severus charmed his boxers a plain black, and conjured himself some robes, which he donned immediately.

When he was done, he looked up abruptly to see that he was being stared at by five of his colleagues. "What?" he snapped.

"Who won?" Albus asked.

Severus rolled his eyes. "Minerva and Amanda. It was Lily."

Albus, Poppy and Filius groaned as they each pulled out their money.

* * *

**_Voldemort's Evil Lair_**

Daniel Parkinson was lucky. He'd only been forced to endure the Tickling Charm for the past ten minutes, until Voldemort had gotten bored. For Voldemort, this was an oddly short amount of time.

Brian Avery wasn't entirely sure why Voldemort was suddenly changing his plans, but he guessed that it had something to do with the letter that had been delivered by a snowy owl he'd never seen before just minutes ago.

"Death Eaters," Voldemort called. Everyone looked up. "We have, it seems, been invited to a party in the Gryffindor Common Room."

Avery blinked. He hadn't been expecting that. He exchanged a glance with Dan. The other man just shrugged.

"There are no Hufflepuffs, and no students under fifth year. I have decided that I will attend. Anyone who wishes to accompany me may do so, but it is certainly not compulsory."

Avery glanced down at his orange tutu. "May I get changed before we go, M'Lord?

Voldemort nodded. "Of course, Avery. I don't think I'd want to be wearing a tutu in front of Harry Potter and Draco Malfoy either."

Dan moved to where Avery was standing. "I think I'll come too. If only to tell people embarrassing stories about Pansy when she was little."

Josephine Zabini, usually called Joe, gave a little squeal. "Ooooh, I think I'll come so I can do the same thing to Blaise!"

Avery grinned. "Sounds like fun. Sam'll hate me, but, oh well."

Melanie Nott shrugged. "I don't see the attraction of embarrassing one's own children, and I wont do so to my son, but I _will _be coming to this party."

Bellatrix Lestrange, having recently escaped Azkaban, also stepped over to the small group. "A party sounds like fun. Who's the host?"

Voldemort grinned. "Would you believe that it's Harry Potter himself?"

The Death Eaters stared, and a recently resurrected Evan Rosier choked on his coke, managing to drop his can right on Flint's head as he did so.

Evan moved over to the group as a new blond Death Eater we're going to call SockPart so not to reveal his true name, asked a question. "Are we going to kill him at this party?"

Voldemort slowly turned and stared at the man, and all the other Death Eaters moved away. "Have you no manners, Lockhart? One does not get invited to a party and murder the host! Of course we aren't going to kill him! Nor are we going to torture him. Or anyone else, for that matter!"

SockPart, now revealed to be none other that Gilderoy Lockhart, cringed.

"You will not be joining us at the party, Lockhart. Now go away before I'm forced to kill you using a toothpick and some duct tape."

Lockhart, not wanting to find out how you killed a person with a toothpick and some duct tape, quickly left the room.

Voldemort stood up. "We shall go now. We don't want to keep Harry waiting.

He headed to he Apparition point, followed by Avery (now wearing much more appropriate clothing), Dan Parkinson, Joe Zabini, Nott, Bellatrix Lestrange, and Evan Rosier.

* * *

**_Gryffindor Common Room_**

"You _WHAT_?"

Harry frowned at his mother, Hermione, Ginny and Ron. "I invited Voldemort and a few of his Death Eaters."

Draco sighed. "That'll be fun," he said sarcastically.

Seamus nodded, ignoring the sarcasm. "Yeah, it sure will!"

Blaise and Pansy (who had joined their little group not long after Cedric left) groaned.

"You invited my father and Blaise's mother," Pansy informed him.

Harry nodded. "Yep, I sure did! I also invited Evan Rosier, because he's been resurrected."

Lily raised an eyebrow. "And you know this how?"

Her son just smirked at her. "Why Mother, I wouldn't dream of telling you such a thing!"

"Brat," she muttered.

Hedwig flew in suddenly, with a piece of parchment.

Harry took it from her and read Voldemort's note.

_'Harry,_

_Thanks for the invite, HQ was getting boring. I'm coming, along with Brian Avery, Daniel Parkinson, Josephine Zabini, Melanie Nott, Bellatrix Lestrange, and Evan Rosier._

_See you when we get there,_

_Voldemort'_

He grinned at Pansy, Blaise, and the nearby Jason Nott and Samuel Avery.

Jason, seeing the grin, joined them looking panicked, followed by Sam. "What's happening?"

Harry smirked. "Your mum, Blaise's mum, Pansy's dad, Sam's dad, Voldemort, and a few other Death Eaters are coming to our party."

The four of them stared at him in horror.

Seamus, however, was giving him an odd look. "There's something that I want to know."

Harry raised an eyebrow. "What?"

"Well," the Irish boy began slowly, "Voldemort's minions are called Death Eaters. Dumbledore opposes him, and thus is considered his opposite. Does that mean that Dumbledore's lackeys are called Life Eaters?"

* * *

I'm afraid I don't have much time; so replies will have to be, well, virtually non-existent.

I am VERY sorry that it took me so long to update this story, but it's twelve pages long and I've been kinda busy.

Thank you EVER so much all of you who reviewed.

headncloud

LoonyLoopyLisa

Ajuxliapose

Jess16

Bella Naris

FantasyChick

jadedawn

JadeDawn (I wasn't sure if you're the same person, because the emails are different, so I put it both times just in case)

bella trix (But of course, Bellatrix was still in Azkaban in that scene! And of course Lucius is cool...)

Can You See

zeldagrl436

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A Sly Fan

Again, thanks.

Please review!

SW


	3. Chapter Three

_**A Party in the Gryffindor Common Room**_

_By SilverWolf7007_

_**Random Shack in Forest Somewhere**_

In a rather random forest, there was a shack.

Within this shack were two vampires.

One of them was intent upon causing immense trouble for anyone and everyone.

The other was somewhat opposed to this, but he had no real choice but to go along with his friend's crazy schemes.

"I ask you again, why is Harry holding a party and inviting his arch enemy…and _not_ the Hufflepuffs?"

Sylvan rolled his eyes exasperatedly. "How many times am I going to have to tell you, Jimmy? Because it's fun."

"And _why _are we going?"

"I, not we. And to cause trouble, of course."

"Why _not_ we?"

"You can't come," Sylvan informed his companion.

His vampiric Sire, James, glared at him. "And why not, may I ask?"

"Because having two James's would be far too complicated," the blond explained.

The other man continued to glare. "So? Why don't we just call James Potter, well, Potter?"

Sylvan rolled his eyes. "Oh honestly, Jimmy!" Then he grinned. "All right, you can come. But as far as anyone is concerned, your name is Jim. Happy?"

James, now Jim, sighed. "Not particularly, but I'll survive."

"Good!" Sylvan exclaimed cheerfully. "Now, Jimmy, let's go. I want to get there before Voldie and co do."

Sighing again, Jim followed his somewhat hyped on sugar friend out of their shack and in the general direction of Hogwarts, heading towards the Gryffindor Common Room and what could quite possibly turn out to be the party of the century.

* * *

**_Gryffindor Common Room_**

Meanwhile, those who had heard Seamus's question had been left pondering the answer, and several debates had arisen.

Harry was just smirking at them all.

Seamus glared at him. "Well, what's your opinion, then?"

"Well, they wouldn't be Life _Eaters_, would they? More likely Life Vomiters, or Life Abstainers, or something."

"Harry?"

"Yes Seamus?"

"The way your mind works worries me immensely."

Harry grinned brightly. "I do but try."

Now that had been resolved, or at least discussed, Harry was left feeling that his party was beginning to lag.

Of course, he then looked around.

The majority of the normally sensible Ravenclaws were now incredibly drunk, while the Gryffindors and Slytherins weren't far off.

Two girls, one Slytherin and one Ravenclaw, had found a bottle of vodka and were drinking shots of it in quick succession, while a third girl of indeterminable House watched them in amusement.

The small group currently awaiting the arrival of Voldemort and his small group of Death Eaters, however, were still sober and standing around the unconscious body of Colin Creevey.

Harry looked down at the younger boy. He then looked up hopefully at Hermione. "Can I kick him?"

"No."

"Please?"

"No."

"Meanie."

"When I choose to be, yes."

Lily was frowning in confusion. "Why do you want to kick him?"

The Slytherins and Gryffindors exchanged glances, not one of them quite willing to discuss Colin with Harry's mother – Harry least of all.

The silence was getting uncomfortable. Lily begun glaring at them all, wanting one of them to answer her question.

"What's going on?" James asked as he, Lucius, Remus, Cedric and Sirius arrived. "Lils, you're glaring holes in your son."

"I most certainly am _not_, James Potter! I am merely waiting for an answer."

"An answer to what?" Remus asked curiously. He immediately regretted asking as Lily turned her glare onto him.

"You taught here, Remy darling. And Cedric, you were a student here. Surely one of you can tell me."

"Tell you what?" Cedric asked warily.

"Why the hell would Harry want to kick Colin here while he's unconscious?" she demanded.

Cedric and Remus eyed the unconscious form on the ground for several minutes.

"Boys?"

Cedric looked up. "It's…hard to explain really," he said.

While Lily's attention was on Cedric, both Remus and Harry took the opportunity to introduce a foot each to Colin's head.

Unfortunately, Hermione caught them. "Harry! Remus! What have I told you about kicking Colin?"

Harry bowed his head sheepishly. "Not to kick him in the head, and…"

"Not to kick him while he's unconscious," Remus finished guiltily.

"Colin's just…creepy," Ginny began finally. "He's oddly obsessed with Harry, and he had small scale obsessions with Remus and Cedric as well."

"And he asks the weirdest things," Harry continued. "I mean, it was bad enough when he wanted a signed photo back in my second year, especially after Lockhart showed up. But really, only last week he asked me if he could take a photo of my toenail."

"He wanted to lick a twig from my broomstick," Cedric revealed with a shudder.

All eyes turned expectantly to Remus.

Remus just stared down at Colin. "Creep," he muttered, nudging the prone form with his toe. "Wanted me to pose naked."

"He asked you that when you were a _teacher_?" Hermione gasped.

"Oh yes," Remus said grimly. "And when Snape revealed that I was a werewolf, he came to my office and asked if I had any werewolf fur he could photograph."

Lily also stared down at Colin. "Weird," she murmured. "Let's all move away from him."

No one moved.

There was silence.

"We're right near the drinks table," Ron said in a small voice.

Lily rolled her eyes and levitated Colin across the room, where several drunken Slytherins began using him for target practice with their bottle tops.

"That looks fun," Sirius commented. "Should do that to Wormy later."

"Speaking of, why are you five back?" Draco asked them. "I thought the torture would go on for days."

"Oh, it will," James said airily. "We just came down for a break. Figured it'd be nice to just hang out for a while…"

"You wanted some alcohol," Ginny surmised.

"Well, yes," Lucius admitted. "Torturing rats can be thirsty work."

"I'm sure," Hermione said dryly.

* * *

**_Hogwarts Entrance Gate_**

"I've just had a thought," Jim said suddenly.

Sylvan turned away from Hogwarts' gates to look at him. "Alert the press."

"Shut up, brat."

"Well, what's this groundbreaking news, then?"

Jim rolled his eyes. "You're not actually invited to this party, are you?"

"Details, details," Sylvan dismissed with a wave of his hand. "Harry knows that I'm likely to show up."

"And just _how_ does he know that, Sylvan?" Jim asked silkily.

Sylvan suddenly looked nervous. "Jimmy, you can't go getting mad at me."

"Give me one good reason and an explanation not to."

"Well, the thing is, Harry is kind of in on the whole resurrecting people to cause trouble plan," Sylvan said hurriedly. "And you can't be mad at me because I'm taking you to a party where you can scare a bunch of teenagers and I let you make off with an outfit entirely from my wardrobe and I didn't even complain and…" he had to stop to gasp for breath, and Jim took the opportunity to place a hand over his mouth to keep him from continuing.

"Okay. I'm not mad. I'm a little annoyed you didn't let _me_ in on it to begin with and let me help, but I'm not mad. So let's go to this party."

"Mrph mrr mrph," Sylvan agreed.

"Oops," Jim said sheepishly, removing his hand.

"All right then," Sylvan repeated.

* * *

**_Gryffindor Tower_**

Sometime between Jim stopping Sylvan and them continuing on their merry way, Voldemort and the Death Eaters passed them.

Dan Parkinson and Brian Avery were leading, with Voldemort on their heels. Behind him, Mel Nott and Joe Zabini were using all their self-control not to turn around and throttle the bickering Bellatrix Lestrange and Evan Rosier.

They passed the Great Hall without incident, despite Dumbledore and the majority of the other teachers currently inside eating dinner.

With help from Evan, who had been a Gryffindor, they found the Common Room quite easily and knocked.

Several seconds later, they knocked again.

Finally, after seven more knocks, the portrait opened and Harry grinned at them brightly. "Glad you lot could make it. Sorry for the delay, not only did I have to be able to hear the knock, but then I had to get across the Common Room."

This comment was entirely undecipherable until the seven of them entered the room, where they immediately understood why Harry had had so much trouble.

Between the drinks table where the group Harry had been with were standing and the entrance were most of the Ravenclaw, Gryffindor and Slytherin students fifth year and up. And most of them were quite drunk.

On their way across the room, many random snatches of conversation were heard.

The most interesting of these, between a Slytherin and her friend of indeterminable House, went something like this:

"Now we've got the jelly under control, what shall we do?"

"I think we need to know when antelope season is."

"I looked it up; in the US it's in the beginning of October."

"Does that count here?"

"It can do."

"Cool. So, what shall we kill these purple antelopes with?"

"Rubber baseball bats?"

"Perhaps. I rather fancy using something pointy, myself. But that's just me."

Avery exchanged a glance with Evan. It would probably be wise to avoid those two girls in future – and the Ravenclaw standing near them chatting up an attractive Gryffindor Seventh year.

* * *

_**Great Hall**_

The Hufflepuff Table was full, and the Gryffindors, Ravenclaws and Slytherins in their first to fourth years were also present, as were most of the teachers.

And while certain Headmasters were still happily oblivious, the Heads of all four Houses, as well as Poppy Pomfrey and Amanda Hooch, were aware that something was going on.

Minerva sighed. "I don't like this. We're missing the older students of most of the Houses, plus one new professor and his wife."

"It's a recipe for trouble all right," Severus agreed grimly. "Now, I dare you all to think back to your Hogwarts days. What activity did you indulge in at least once before you graduated that you excluded the Hufflepuffs from? No offence, Anthea."

"None taken," the head of Hufflepuff said with a roll of her eyes.

"Parties," Poppy realised immediately. "The Hufflepuffs are never invited to parties."

"It's because of the whole pin the tail on the Hippogriff thing, isn't it?" Anthea sighed.

"Well, that and the fact that Hufflepuffs can't hold their alcohol," Filius said.

"So someone in one of the other Houses has invited everyone else to a party," Minerva stated. "I'd just like to state my belief that it was Harry Potter who did it – mainly because it's likely that his parents are in attendance."

"What are we going to do about it?" Amanda inquired.

"Nothing," Severus told her immediately, gaining surprised stares from his colleagues. "Well, we could always crash the party. Knowing Potter – all three of them – as well as the other students, they're bound to have some interesting ideas of entertainment."

"So who's for crashing after dinner?" Minerva inquired.

Everyone but Anthea raised his or her hand. "I'll pass. I _am_ a Hufflepuff, after all."

"And we all know how well you hold your alcohol," Poppy added with a smirk.

* * *

_**Gryffindor Common Room**_

Once he had led Voldemort and his companions across the room, Harry left them and headed back to the entrance, where he seemed to be waiting for someone.

Lucius raised an eyebrow at his Lord in surprise. "I wasn't expecting you here, My Lord."

"And I wasn't expecting to see you, Lucius," replied an equally surprised Dark Lord. "May I ask _why _you are here as opposed to your Manor, where you should be torturing Wormtail?"

"To be quite honest, My Lord, were I not here, Wormtail wouldn't have been tortured nearly as much as he has been so far. James, Remus, Sirius and Cedric have been assisting me."

Voldemort smirked at the three men in question. "Hope you've been having fun. And don't worry, you can keep him for as long as he stays alive."

"Cool," Sirius commented.

"Voldie, I have something I wish to _talk _to you about," Lily said in a poisonously sweet voice. "Would you mind coming up to the Torture Room with me?"

A very nervous Voldemort held back a terrified squeak. "Not at all," he managed. "Lead the way."

"So, Bella," Sirius began conversationally. "You've escaped from Azkaban, I see."

"Yes," she replied. "Wasn't hard. The same vampire who resurrected Evan, Lily, James and Cedric helped me do it. Nice guy, if a little insane."

Sirius raised an eyebrow at her. "You spent fourteen or so years in Azkaban and you think _he's_ a little insane?"

"I never said I _wasn't_. And I daresay you are as well, my dear cousin. Just a tad."

He stuck his tongue out at her. She replied in kind.

Five minutes later, Lily, James, Remus, the students and the Death Eaters were placing bets on who would win first the staring contest, and the all out wrestling match that Remus assured them was certain to follow it.

* * *

Harry was waiting.

He knew Sylvan would show up eventually, probably with James – or Jim, he supposed – in tow.

Yep, _any_ minute now.

Vampires, of course, were known to be 'fashionably late'. Well, that had been Sylvan's excuse for tardiness for the past two hundred years, according to Jim, and it was doubtful he'd come up with another.

But even for Sylvan, this was getting beyond just _tardy_.

Someone knocked on the portrait.

Rolling his eyes, Harry opened it, expecting the two vampires.

Instead, he found Minerva, Severus, Poppy, Amanda and Filius.

"Professors, Madam Pomfrey, Madam Hooch…can I help you with something?"

Minerva raised an eyebrow. "We're crashing your party, Potter."

Harry grinned. "Oh, in that case, come on in. The drinks are up the back, you'll see the group of students and adults back there watching Siri and Bellatrix fighting. Have fun."

Somewhat confused, they stepped inside and headed for the drinks.

Severus stopped dead halfway there, nudging Minerva and Filius. "Who let those three have alcohol?"

"Which three?" Filius asked.

"Jennifer Aldrich, Jordyn Astra and Tora Bennett."

Minerva and Filius carefully manoeuvred themselves behind Severus.

"I'm not taking sole responsibility!" Severus protested. "Aldrich is definitely one of yours, Filius."

"Yes, but Astra and Bennett are Slytherins, Severus. You have the majority of responsibility."

"And I have none at all," Minerva said cheerfully.

"As Deputy Headmistress, you actually have some responsibility for all three of them, Minerva," Severus pointed out.

All three professors pondered the three girls in question, who seemed to be plotting someone's death.

They then gave in, joined the group at the drinks table, and secured a bottle of firewhisky.

* * *

Harry watched the distress of his professors in amusement. Admittedly, he wasn't sure that letting Jenny, Jordyn and Tora have alcohol was a good idea either, but it was still entertaining to see the teachers squirm.

Finally, there was another knock at the portrait. He pushed it open and glared at the sheepish blond vampire outside it. "You're later than late, Sylvan."

"It's not my fault," Sylvan complained. "Jimmy made me loiter."

"I bloody well did not," the black haired man complained. "You were the one who took ages to get dressed."

"Yes, because you're wearing my favourite shirt."

Jim looked down in mock surprise at the sapphire silk shirt he was wearing. "Well so I am. Get over it."

Sylvan stepped past Harry into the Common Room, tugging irritably on the sleeves of his dark red shirt. "All right, where're the drinks?"

Silently, Harry pointed. Sylvan gave him a vague salute and headed straight for the rum.

"Is everyone here, then?" Jim asked.

Harry nodded, beginning to smirk.

"Then should we get this party _really_ started?"

"Good plan. I've always wanted to get my teachers drunk and pry out their most embarrassing secrets."

"Can I help?" Jim inquired hopefully.

"Of course."

"Then shall we?"

"We shall."

* * *

Er…

Well.

Huge major thanks to the following people for reviewing.

_**Liber Creperum-Liber Diabolus, **LoonyLoopyLisa, **SalanTrong, **Dual Maxwell, **KaylaisEvenstar, **TheSilverLady, **Pure Black, **Song Gift, **Silver-Enchantress-Elf, **australiaman, **FairyDuster, **Shinigami, **Jersey Princess, **Silverone3, **Silver Scale Serpent, **fifespice, **DeppDRACOmaniac, **blakmagevamp, **Ranma Higurashi, **Sapphire Dragons, **stepht**_

Again, thanks heaps, guys. Sorry for the huge wait.

Please review and let me know your thoughts on this chapter.

_S. Wolf_


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